{"chapter_no":"28","chapter_title":"The Answer Comes","book_id":"2","book_name":"The Story of James","subchapter_no":"0","page_no":"316","page_number":"1","verses_count":0,"total_pages":6,"page_content":"

 <\/p>

Chapter 28<\/p>

The Answer Comes<\/h1><\/p>

 <\/p>

Barbara receives a better understanding of miracles and the requirements to bring them about—
She bears a stirring testimony in sacrament meeting.<\/i><\/p>

 <\/p>

 <\/p>

 <\/p>

Four years had passed, and it was now the spring of 1981. The longing for Audrey and
the fond memories of her would never go away, but with the passage of time, the emotional
wounds had healed, and everyone in the family was enjoying happy times again. <\/p>

 <\/p>

Beth was nineteen years old and attended college at the local university. Barbara kept a
close eye on her, always checking up on who she was dating. <\/p>

 <\/p>

Her biggest worries in life, however, were for her oldest daughter Lisa. The marriage of
Mike and Lisa had been a constant soap opera; the two of them were either fighting about
money, separating, or struggling to stay active in the Church. Ever since her teenage years, Lisa
had been a challenge for her mother to deal with, and she had married Mike––a man prone to
learn things the hard way in life––against her wishes. Her son Jonathon, in contrast, was more
like Beth. He had faithfully served a mission, and had continued on from there making good
choices in his life. He and his wife lived in Colorado, and it pleased her to talk with them quite
often on the phone.<\/p>

 <\/p>

One evening Barbara lay in bed, absorbed in thoughts about the most recent fight
between Lisa and her husband. It seemed that Mike wanted to buy a used motorboat from a
friend of his, but it would require a large part of their limited savings to make the down payment
on the loan. Oddly enough, it was here as Barbara lay in bed pondering this matter that she was
treated to another special blessing from the Lord. <\/p>

 <\/p>

Worrying, as a mother is prone to do, about this motorboat squabble, her thoughts were
interrupted––the image of Audrey suddenly came into her mind. She saw Audrey sitting on a
chair and not feeling well. Gary was preparing to lay his hands on her head to give her a
priesthood blessing. This troubling scene entered her mind with a quick splash, without giving
her emotions a chance to prepare. The scene made her ill, bringing back the all-too-familiar
feelings of depression. Confused, she wondered why the Spirit would want to revisit the matter
again, seeing that it had caused her so much pain at the time and so much anger towards God.
She didn't hear a whispering of the Spirit, she just had this agonizing image pass through her
mind again. A great deal of time had passed, which made the pain easier to bear this time; and it
was also true that she had grown much stronger in faith over the preceding four years. <\/p>

Nevertheless, the manner in which this terrible ordeal was placed back into her mind at this
moment was very curious.<\/p>

 <\/p>

She recalled how much she and Gary had hoped for a miracle at the time. They had fasted
many times, and had prayed earnestly with a strong faith in God, all while striving to be humble
and accept the will of the Lord... whatever that might be. Gary was a man of God––she knew that
fact assuredly. But notwithstanding all the priesthood blessings he performed, both alone and
with other priesthood holders, a miracle never did occur for Audrey. Why not?<\/p>

 <\/p>

Pondering this question, her mind was soon filled by the Spirit with a series of new
thoughts. These were not audible pronouncements by the voice of the Spirit passing through her
mind as she was accustomed to; no, the Spirit was interacting with her mind, touching her
thoughts with light and truth, showing her and teaching her concepts as she pondered over the
matter. It might have seemed to her that she was coming up with all of these ideas and thoughts
herself, but she knew better—she was thinking with the Spirit. The powerful reasoning, and the
dynamic way in which her thoughts were being written upon, like quick and gentle bursts of
energy, left her no doubt as to what was really going on<\/span>.<\/p>

 <\/p>

The first general question that entered her mind was this: What about before Audrey
became sick?<\/i><\/p>

 <\/p>

Barbara had never thought of that before. Immediately, there was a leap of her stomach.
Yes, she and others had demonstrated faith, but the faith of everyone involved had come about
very late in the process, only after Audrey had been diagnosed with the disease.<\/p>

 <\/p>

She reasoned through this new question in her mind.<\/p>

 <\/p>

What could I have done to strengthen my faith in God beforehand? Why didn’t I start
thinking about miracles more seriously, and the faith required to do them, before the need with
Audrey even came up?<\/i><\/p>

 <\/p>

Surely one should try to be proactive in the work of the Lord—bringing souls to <\/i>H<\/i>im and
striving to do great miracles in the name of Christ before the eyes of the people.<\/i><\/p>

 <\/p>

The Spirit then placed a second question in her mind.<\/p>

 <\/p>

And what about after?<\/i><\/p>

 <\/p>

She had considered this question before, but not in the way the Spirit was asking here.
She considered it more fully now.<\/p>

 <\/p>

What would have followed in our lives had a miracle come forth and the disease in
Audrey had been removed? Would we have just shrugged our shoulders and gone about doing
things in the gospel the same as we had before she became sick?<\/i><\/p>

We wanted help from the Lord, but what about the help in His work that the Lord desires
from us? I have always done my duty in <\/i>the Church<\/i>, but not much more than those things
members of <\/i>the Church<\/i> are normally asked to do.<\/i><\/p>

 <\/p>

The Spirit was answering all of her questions, the ones she had struggled mightily with
years before. The answer she was receiving now was painful to hear––a miracle to cure Audrey
would have been a stronger possibility had the family been better spiritually prepared. This gave
her a new perspective, allowing her to see the bigger picture and to understand what had been
needed at the time to control the powers of heaven. Being the righteous woman that she was, the
pain of learning this sad truth was quickly overcome by the joy she felt in receiving personal
revelation in the matter. Personal revelation from God was a miracle in itself, and it was
amazing! She had asked God for understanding, and now years later, she was experiencing the
wonderful light and knowledge she had requested. <\/p>

 <\/p>

She exclaimed, “The things of God––how great they are!” <\/p>

 <\/p>

She spoke neither with a harsh nor loud voice, but the walls of the house shook as though
she had. It was like she had slammed the door of the bedroom hard again, but this time in a
joyful manner.<\/p>

 <\/p>

Gary, brushing his teeth in the next room, felt the tremor.<\/p>

 <\/p>

“Honey, did you say something?” he asked, his words muddled by toothpaste.<\/p>

 <\/p>

“Just keep brushing your teeth,” she yelled back to him with a smile.<\/p>

 <\/p>

Another tremor would soon be felt, but this time by the members of her ward in
sacrament meeting. For on the following Sunday, it being the first Sunday of the month, she got
to her feet and went before the congregation to bear her testimony. Consumed with the fire of the
Holy Ghost, she spoke these words:<\/p>

 <\/p>

“I have only a few words to express to you today as I bear my testimony. <\/p>

 <\/p>

“I know that Jesus Christ lives. <\/p>

 <\/p>

“I know that God is a God of miracles. <\/p>

 <\/p>

“And I know He wants miracles to occur in our lives in much greater numbers than they
do today—miracles by tens, miracles by the hundreds, and miracles by the thousands. My family
should aspire to become a family of miracles. And the same is true for all of us in the ward—the
Millville 2nd Ward should strive to become a ward of great miracles.”<\/p>

 <\/p>

The Spirit came upon her, overpowering her mortal frame. And it must be said that never
before this moment had she ever possessed a stronger testimony of the principle that families are
forever; she could feel it, as if the veil had been taken away and Audrey was standing there
beside her ready to take her hand and bear a joint testimony with her to the masses. <\/p>

 <\/p>

The negative emotions from all she had suffered with Audrey years before now
quickened inside of her, being transformed to their polar opposite, replaced with joyful emotions
at the same level. Extreme bitterness had been replaced with an exquisite happiness. <\/p>

 <\/p>

In addition, the love shown to her by God in answering her questions—in helping her to
understand much that had happened during the ordeal—was something wonderful to her in its
own right. Ah, the love of God! These two things coming together at this time created a level of
joy so great that her shoulder muscles and arms started to tense up. <\/p>

 <\/p>

She continued.<\/p>

 <\/p>

“Audrey is happy today—I know that for sure. If Gary, I, and the rest of our family are
faithful, we will have the chance to join with her and live together forever as a family. I so look
forward to being able to be with her for the eternities!”<\/p>

 <\/p>

Instinctively, Barbara almost turned her head to the right and said, “Isn’t that right
sweetie?” as though Audrey were standing beside her.<\/p>

 <\/p>

“What a great promise this is to all of us,” continued Barbara, “and an example of why
the fulness of the gospel we have been given is so wonderful. Those who don’t take the
opportunity to study this Church, and to test it out fully by prayer, are surely missing a lot. <\/p>

 <\/p>

“Oh, how I miss having Audrey around with me all of the time! <\/p>

 <\/p>

“There is no doubt in my mind that had she lived longer, she would have done great
things on this earth, much greater things even than what she already was able to do among us in
her short time. <\/p>

 <\/p>

“And so, after much prayer and pondering, and after four years of waiting, I have finally
come to an understanding of much that happened during that difficult period of my life. As you
might imagine, nobody could have wanted a miracle more than I, unless of course it was Gary or
Beth. But I have to admit to you today that the final outcome, Audrey's death as a result of the
disease, was driven entirely by the limits of modern medicine. It wasn’t necessarily the Lord’s
will that she die so early in life, although He permitted it and was more than happy to receive
her. When He gives a child to us, that’s an obvious indication that He wants us to have that child
for a full and happy life. <\/p>

 <\/p>

“You might look at it like this. As parents, we are crossing the plains, trying to reach
Zion, and our children are right there beside us.” <\/p>

 <\/p>

Again, there was a hint of Barbara's head turning to the right to see Audrey.<\/p>

 <\/p>

“The Lord wants all of our children to reach the Salt Lake Valley with us, although some
might become sick and lose their life along the way, as will be the case for many adults as well.
If that happens, the reward in heaven for all involved is not lessened in the slightest. But the <\/p>

original intent, and the hope of the Lord, is that the child arrives to this beautiful land, grows up
to adulthood, becomes a parent and brings other children into the world, and is able to do
magnificent things in the gospel for themselves, their families, and all the other people who live
on this earth. <\/p>

 <\/p>

“It reverts back to the original commandment of the gospel––multiply and replenish the
earth. The default position of the Lord is always that life should go forth. There may be a small
percentage of situations where the outcome is predetermined––if the Lord wants to take someone
from the earth before reaching a normal, average life expectancy––and where the Lord will not
grant a miracle under any circumstances. But those cases can be made known to us later on in the
due time of the Lord. We have to go on the assumption and believe that a miracle is possible in
almost every situation that we have need of in our lives.<\/p>

 <\/p>

“In Audrey's case, as her mother, I demonstrated the faith of a grieving parent, but I did
so very late in the process, waiting until I had a specific need from God rather than making a
more significant effort to grow in faith beforehand. That was not the best time to start petitioning
the Lord for a miracle. I can see now that my faith in the Lord at the time was largely superficial,
driven by a deathbed-like repentance. I had faith, but insufficient prior works to back it up.
While Gary and I have always been active in the Church, when the issue arose with Audrey, it
seemed like it was only then that we rushed into a crash course of excellence in gospel living,
trying to raise our level of faith and obedience at the last minute. That was the wrong approach.
What we should have done is sought the Lord early on in our lives, that He might know us better
and we know Him; and that He might know that we were very much interested in the work––His
work, and also our work––of saving souls; and also, that we were planning our lives and growing
strong in the gospel without Him having to remind us again, and without a need first arising from
a health emergency of one of our children. <\/p>

 <\/p>

“Had we done that, our petition for a miracle would have been much stronger, and we
would have been more worthy and better prepared to receive what we wanted. When the time
came for Gary to lay his hands on Audrey, to bless her for the first time, he would have done so
with a much firmer faith in God, certainly willing to accept the Lord’s will either way, but very
much prepared in his heart to bring to pass a great miracle. Instead, he doubted, and so did I. We
doubted because our hearts had been mostly focused inward on our own needs, and not so much
on the temporal and spiritual welfare of our friends and neighbors––including all of you here in
this ward today––who share this earth with us. We sacrificed much and increased in charity
during that difficult period, but it was mostly forced upon us by circumstances, and not by a
conscious decision made in our hearts far in advance of the need. <\/p>

 <\/p>

“Gary and I cried before, during, and after each blessing he performed, hoping with all
our hearts for a miracle, and filled with faith of a kind. But as a family we simply were not ready
to control the powers of heaven. To heal the sick, the Lord can do very subtle things to achieve
the miraculous outcome we seek. A one-step laying on of hands and instant healing is certainly
possible, but most likely a miracle will require us to follow a more drawn-out process––a project
with many related tasks––involving a series of temporal and spiritual blessings which lead to the
final, successful result. Family-level revelation from the Spirit to guide us step by step in that
process may also be needed, not just the performance of the priesthood blessing itself.<\/p>

 <\/p>

“Most important, however, of all the things that I learned, is that charity is the greatest
miracle of all. Through charity, we can follow the example of the Savior and overcome the
world, and thereby find the means to bring about almost any kind of miracle, large or small, we
can think of. This is our first task in seeking out the Lord early––to be filled with charity.<\/p>

 <\/p>

“May we strive to have the firmness in faith required so that many more children like my
sweet Audrey can be healed by the power of God, as well as many more teenagers, adults, and
elderly persons with special needs who reside within our midst. <\/p>

 <\/p>

“I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.”<\/p>"}