Chapter 40

The Blessings of Zion in Marriage

The relationship of James and Beth flourishes—They are married, settle into a new apartment,
and raise a family—Their baby daughter Marie is a divine creature—The boundless love of mothers
everywhere.

James slept in late on Saturday morning, arising at 8:30 to eat breakfast. He happily
shared the news of meeting Beth with his mother and father, beaming as he talked.

After showering and getting dressed, he took his dad’s truck, a 1976 Ford Ranger used
for hauling tools and supplies, to the local car wash for a good cleaning. The inside of the cab
was vacuumed and work-related papers and other clutter were removed––James anticipated Beth
riding with him in the passenger side later that day. The car wash task completed, he returned
home.

At 11:00, he backed out of the driveway and proceeded west to the entrance of the I-15
freeway. Driving a while on the freeway, he turned off at Brigham City and then continued on to
Sardine canyon. It was raining hard and, therefore, a little messy on the roads, so the effort to
clean the outside of the truck went largely for naught; otherwise, the drive through the canyon
was very pleasant. James brought a favorite cassette to listen to along the way, but he was too
excited and nervous to pay any attention to it.

He arrived at the Stewart home in Millville a few minutes early. Beth was there at the
door to meet him and directly introduced him to her parents.

Barbara, in particular, was anxious to meet this new boy, having heard Beth describe him
at length the night before. James’s small truck outside wasn’t particularly appealing to her,
having seen very nice automobiles arrive outside in the past when Beth was picked up for dates.
She couldn’t help but notice the special shoe and the obvious impairment James had as he
walked into the living room with Beth. He was also very young—a possible red flag in her mind
as she greeted him for the first time and shook his hand. But once they had all gathered into the
living room and talked for a while, she felt more at ease with him. He was clearly different from
any of the others Beth had dated. There was something special about him, and he seemed older
than he actually was. She liked him, too.

Barbara watched Beth just as closely as she watched James. She could read her
daughter’s eyes and gestures; they were filled with energy and excitement... much more around
James than any other boy who had previously come calling.

At 12:30, they all sat down for lunch. Barbara and Beth had prepared a fine meal of
baked ham with pineapple glaze, mashed potatoes, chef salad, dinner rolls, and broccoli cheese
soup. This was followed by a serving of peach cobbler with vanilla ice cream for dessert. The
family’s best silverware, china, and dinner placements were used. Through this, James could see
that Beth was sending a message to him. He couldn’t help but smile towards her and exchange
glances with her at every opportunity. Beth returned his smiles. They were in love.

After lunch, James and Beth moved to the backyard and sat upon lawn chairs under a
large tree. In this delightful setting, they continued their conversation of the prior evening. Later
that afternoon, the two went to a movie matinee in downtown Logan and afterwards had dinner
at a restaurant on Main Street. At the end of the evening, around 9:30, James took Beth home. He
then triumphantly made his way back home to Ogden.

Sitting down with her mom after the date was over, Beth listened as Barbara shared her
impressions of James. It was a fun discussion. Beth was excited to hear that Barbara liked him,
too. Gary also had good things to say about James, but otherwise left the matter in the hands of
the two women to figure out.

As for James, he had been overwhelmed by Beth from the first moment he saw her at the
dance. He had only one worry––Will she really like me? The wonderful first day they had spent
together in Cache Valley had answered that question. He could see that Beth had taken a special
liking to him, and they were fast becoming good friends.

With each date that followed, the relationship flourished and grew stronger. It was neither
rushed nor delayed by either one in its progress. Throughout the winter, and into the spring of
1982, they continued dating once, and sometimes twice, a week. James became accustomed to
the drive up to Cache Valley and soon he was able to afford a vehicle of his own.

In the month of May, they were engaged. In August, they were married in the Logan
temple. And from that point forward, as it is written in the scriptures, “they lived after the
manner of happiness.”

A common theme of this book is duty versus desire. In the story of James and Beth thus
far, the reader might take a moment to consider the differences between an arranged marriage––a
marriage based on duty, tradition, obedience, family honor, or parental wishes––and a marriage
where both individuals are free to choose for themselves and are filled with desire towards one
another. We see and understand this principle plainly in the courtship of a man and a woman,
and we should look for it as well when we go about the work of the Lord.

Duty is called, desire is chosen—desire for each other, and a desire for the things of God.
Desire in the gospel is like a beautiful romantic relationship, where love blossoms and happiness
is found at every turn. Duty in gospel service is like an arranged marriage, serving our purposes

in the Church at a fundamental level, but lacking the essence of love. There should be more than
duty in marriage, just as there should be more than just duty in the gospel. True desire
encompasses all aspects of duty that a couple should expect from one another in marriage.
Humility, desire, and love—all of these have duty at their core, but then they go much further,
advancing us towards excellence in gospel living first and perfection later.

For the newly married couple, the immediate temporal needs quickly took center stage.
James found a comfortable apartment in his North Ogden home ward only a few doors down
from where Sarah Francis and her children had lived prior to her marriage to Charles White. And
most prominent among the wedding gifts they received was a beautiful painting from Charles
and Sarah. The painting was too large to display in their small apartment, so they kept it
packaged up and stored in the basement of James’s parent's home.

James had already started working full time with his dad, and that now consumed almost
all of his energy and free time. He had to learn how to fully manage large landscape projects
completely on his own. In time, his knowledge and skill level developed sufficiently that he was
able to earn a good living at it and provide for his family.

Aware of his prior years of experience serving in the ward, the bishopric quickly put
James to work as the first counselor in the elders quorum presidency. A year later, after the
quorum president graduated college and took a job back East, James replaced him in that role.
Both leadership positions were an incredibly good fit for James, providing further opportunity
for him to learn more about the inner workings of the ward. As for Beth, she served first as a
Primary teacher, and then later was called as a counselor in the Young Women’s presidency.

At the end of their first year of marriage, the couple had their first child––a baby boy
whom they named Jason. Immediately, their lives changed. They were no longer a couple, but a
family. Their financial needs increased, and the time they had available for themselves instantly
decreased.

Jason was a handful. Once he was able to walk, he spent much of his time in motion,
doing playful things, talking, screaming, crying, and getting under his mother’s feet. He also
looked forward to the time when James came home so he could show him things he had built that
day with blocks, toy logs, or Legos. He learned how to draw and color with paper and crayons,
showing already some natural ability as an artist.

Midway through the third year of their marriage, they had a second child––Maria, a
beautiful baby girl. The addition of Maria to the family was extra special for Beth, and also for
Barbara, as she had a certain likeness to Audrey, both in how she talked and even in her
appearance. She was akin to a young Cossette in the arms of her mother Fantine when they
arrived at the Thénardier's Inn at the outskirts of Paris. The book describes them as follows:

Fantine, as we shall see, had the fierce bravery of life. She had already valiantly
renounced finery, had dressed herself in linen, and had put all her silks, all her ornaments, all
her ribbons, and all her laces on her daughter, the only vanity which was left to her, and a holy
one it was. She sold all that she had, which produced for her two hundred francs; her little debts

paid, she had only about eighty francs left. At the age of twenty-two, on a beautiful spring
morning, she quitted Paris, bearing her child on her back. Anyone who had seen these two pass
would have had pity on them. This woman had, in all the world, nothing but her child, and the
child had, in all the world, no one but this woman. Fantine had nursed her child, and this had
tired her chest, and she coughed a little.

This woman's child was one of the most divine creatures that it is possible to behold. It
was a girl, two or three years of age. She could have entered into competition with the two other
little ones, so far as the coquetry of her dress was concerned; she wore a cap of fine linen,
ribbons on her bodice, and Valenciennes lace on her cap. The folds of her skirt were raised so as
to permit a view of her white, firm, and dimpled leg. She was admirably rosy and healthy. The
little beauty inspired a desire to take a bite from the apples of her cheeks. Of her eyes nothing
could be known, except that they must be very large, and that they had magnificent lashes.

She was asleep. She slept with that slumber of absolute confidence peculiar to her age.
The arms of mothers are made of tenderness; in them children sleep profoundly. She bestowed
on her daughter a passionate kiss, which woke her. The child opened her eyes, great blue eyes
like her mother's, and looked at—what? Nothing; with that serious and sometimes severe air of
little children, which is a mystery of their luminous innocence in the presence of our twilight of
virtue. One would say that they feel themselves to be angels, and that they know us to be men.
Then the child began to laugh; and although the mother held fast to her, she slipped to the
ground with the unconquerable energy of a little being which wished to run. All at once she
caught sight of the two others in the swing, stopped short, and put out her tongue, in sign of
admiration.

This was Maria.

As for Beth, in her role as mother in the home, we see a fine parallel of her in the
description of Mademoiselle Baptistine, paraphrased here to showcase the attributes of godliness
found in women everywhere:

To have continually at one's side a mother, a charming being, who is there because you
need her and because she cannot do without you; to know that we are indispensable to a person
who is necessary to us; to be able to incessantly measure one's affection by the amount of her
presence which she bestows on us, and to say to ourselves, "Since she consecrates the whole of
her time to me, it is because I possess the whole of her heart"; to be able to verify the fidelity of
one being amid the eclipse of the world; to regard the rustle of a gown as the sound of wings; to
hear her come and go, retire, speak, return, sing, and to think that one is the centre of these
steps, of this speech; to manifest at each instant one's personal attraction; to feel one's self all
the more powerful because of one's infirmity; to become in one's obscurity, and through one's
obscurity, the star around which this angel gravitates,—few felicities equal this.

The supreme happiness of life consists in the conviction that one is loved; loved for one's
own sake—let us say rather, loved in spite of one's self. To be served in distress is to be caressed.
Do we lack anything? No. And what love! A love wholly constituted of virtue! There is no
blindness where there is certainty. Soul seeks soul, gropingly, and finds it. And this soul, found

and tested, is a woman. A hand sustains you; it is hers: a mouth lightly touches your brow; it is
her mouth: you hear a breath very near you; it is hers. To have everything of her, from her
worship to her pity, never to be left, to have that sweet weakness aiding you, to lean upon that
immovable reed, to touch Providence with one's hands, and to be able to take it in one's arms,—
God made tangible,—what bliss! The heart, that obscure, celestial flower, undergoes a
mysterious blossoming. One would not exchange that shadow for all brightness! The angel soul
is there, uninterruptedly there; if she departs, it is but to return again; she vanishes like a dream,
and reappears like reality. One feels warmth approaching, and behold! she is there. One
overflows with serenity, with gayety, with ecstasy; one is a radiance amid the night. And there
are a thousand little cares. Nothings, which are enormous in that void. The most ineffable
accents of the feminine voice employed to lull you, and supplying the vanished universe to you.
One is caressed with the soul. One sees nothing, but one feels that one is adored. It is a paradise
of shadows.

This was Beth, the effect she had on her young ones and on her husband, and a brief
description of the qualifications for her chosen career in life.

Like other young couples, James and Beth struggled at first to make their way in the
world. Modest circumstances limited what they could do every day in the little free time they
had. The landmark painting given to them was stored away for the moment, and the same was
true of their special lifetime goal in the gospel. They performed their Church callings faithfully
each week, but beyond that, they could only watch and wait, hoping for the time when they could
do more.

A period of watching and waiting will be common for any person who is striving to live
the law of consecration, and who aspires to help in the establishment of Zion in his or her ward.
We saw this in the story of Charles White as he pondered his grandmother Ellie’s teachings,
contemplating the things he might do with the money she had given him.

During this time of waiting, however, James and Beth were still able to enjoy most, if not
all, of the blessings that come to a married couple who have fully consecrated themselves to the
work of the Lord. How was this possible? These blessings came to them early because of their
desires and their plans for the future. The two of them shared a common vision of what a ward of
the Church—their ward—might become one day. They dreamed in their hearts; they treasured up
inside themselves the beautiful things they would do together in the gospel once their temporal
affairs were set in order. They prayed often, always searching for the means to accomplish these
things, and looking forward to when that time might come. Would the opportunity present itself
next year? In three years? How soon before we can start? Their manner of thinking, feeling, and
hoping allowed them to draw blessings from the future—from the mere vision of Zion in their
hearts only—and enjoy them in the present.

In the meantime, they continued to prepare themselves, doing the important preparatory
work for their goals. It was about this time that the Spirit of God took up residence in their
apartment and became a permanent member of the family.